Chemically Unstable
by Ashkie Sage
Summary: What happens when a 18 year old Codie loses her best and only friend? What happens when it turns out her best friend had bought her a VIP My Chemical Romance ticket? *NOTE- I started rewriting the story because I realised how bad my writing was earlier. Now you can either start at chapter 1 with my terrible writing or you can skip straight to chapter 10- Gone but not forgotten
1. Chapter 1

**DISCLAMER: I DON'T OWN MCR OR ANY OF THEIR THINGS JUST MY OWN.**

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Cody POV

It was the last day before high school ended when I got the call. My only true friend, Nikki, was dead from an overdose. My world fell before my eyes as I walked to school. She was the only one who understood me; the only one who didn't care what I looked or acted like. She was my best friend and now she was gone. I would of driven, but I felt like I would crash into the first thing I saw.

When I got to school my "friend" Elizabeth came up to me and said "Hey girl are you okay?" I just glared at her and walked right past. She huffed and said "Bitch! No wonder you don't have any friends."

My name is Cody Rapp and its true I felt completely and utterly alone in this big world of ours. I had pitch black hair with bleach blonde tips that was cut to my shoulders, though my true hair color is black anyways. I was around 5'1 with hazel eyes and stick skinny. I was made fun of day and night every since I can remember because One I have a guys name, Two I dress differently, Three I'm not like other kids, and Four I don't fit in. On my 16 birthday and 18 birthday my only friend was Nikki.

My family...ugh what to say. They are never there for me and I don't really even know them. My parents are both workaholics who spend most of their time in England then at home in Newark, NJ. I don't have any siblings so I was a loner. The only thing I had was my music. It was the only thing that held me together; the only thing that could never leave me.

As I continued down the hall to my third class Adam, a jock, said "Hey everyone look its Cody. Little Mr. Loner opps I mean Ms. Loner." Everyone started laughing and calling me little names they've come up with. I just ignored it all and ran outside to the courtyard. I sat down and turned my Ipod onto I'm Not Okay by My Chemical Romance. As I listened I grabbed my sketch book and started to draw. By the time I had finished I'm Not Okay, Demolition Lovers, Heaven Help Us, Mama, and Our Lady Of Sorrows I had already drawn like twenty-five pages all related to either My Chemical Romance, pain, death, or anything I was feeling.

I got up knowing I should head to my last class which was art because after that would be the graduation ceremony. As soon as I walked into art the kids started calling me names again. I ignored it and sat down at a table. Then I grabbed some paper and sharpies while putting my headphones back in. I closed my eyes picturing a My Chemical Romance concert and set of drawing it. When I was done I had drawn My Chem performing to a group of kids. It was an amazing peace of work and also really detailed. I smiled at my work and moved onto another which turned into a funeral scene.

Finally the bell rang and all the seniors gathered in the social hall to get their caps and gowns as well as getting in place. Finally the time came for them to call us one by one to receive our diploma. I was zoned out the entire time until the principle called my name and I stepped forward to receive my diploma. I looked out at the auditorium scanning the crowd full of students and parents to see if my parents came. Of course they didn't and I just zoned back out until we could finally leave.

As my classmates said their goodbyes and I'm going to miss you I quickly snuck out the back not knowing that Adam and his group had followed me. As soon as I had left school grounds Adam yelled "Hey Mr. loner where do you think your going? You didn't say goodbye to me." I ignored him and kept walking holding my bag tight.

Suddenly I felt I rock peg me in the back so I whipped around and came face to face with Adam. I glared at him as he threw a punch at me which I blocked and quickly punched his nose. He fell to the ground holding his now broken nose as his gang tended to him. I turned back around and kept walking only to be stopped by a hand on my shoulder. Once again I whipped around only to come face to face with one of Adam's friends. He too tried to punch me, but failed since I was to quick for any of them. Soon after that the rest of the gang had either a broken nose or the breath knocked out of them. I took a deep breath and continued walking.

Once I made it home I didn't walk inside the house instead I climbed into my black Tahoe and drove of towards Meg's. She was a good friend about 5 or 6 years older then me. A few years ago I went to her tattoo pallor and got a Jack Skellington tattoo on my arm and the words Demolition Lovers around my arm as an armband. I was going there to get another tat and to talk. She was there for me and I needed that since I no longer had Nikki. I was almost there when Shoots and Ladders by Korn came on. I started singing "_Ring around the rosies Pocket full of posies Ashes ashes we all fall down Ring around the rosies Pocket full of posies " _I laughed thinking about how Nikki and I would always sing that song in little childish voices.

It was a little painful to think about Nikki, but she was connected to everything I did. She introduced me to My Chemical Romance a few years back after I was about to commit suicide. Ever since then she's been with me always. She was more like my mother then my own mother ever was. After the suicide incident my parents just gave me $1,000 a week so I wouldn't bug them. Half of that I would put into my own little banking account that I had set up. They also, like most parents, had set up a college funds account which had more money then you could imagine in it, as did my savings account.

I finally made it to Meg's without crying or crashing, which surprised me since I was a wreck. As I walked in Meg yelled "Cody what took you so long? Come right into the back." I smiled she always knew when I was coming; don't ask me how she just did. I walked right into the back to find her already setting everything up. She turned towards me with open arms and said "Come here little girl. It was just her time so don't worry. Your gonna be all right." I smiled weakly as I hugged her back saying "Thanks Meg. I don't know how you do it, but you make everything seem so much better then it really is." She smiled and, motioned to the chair, and said "What shall it be this time?"

I laughed and said "Okay well on my lower back I want My Chemical Romance with I'm Not O-Fucking-Kay underneath it. Then I would like True Love across my fingers in a sort of spidery font. Oh and for the My Chem one can you do a sort of wild font for it? Finally I'd like you to add a gravestone next to Jack that says Nikki.'

She nodded and said "Let's see…One My Chem that in wild font, one True Love that in spidery font, and one gravestone by Jack. Well let's get this party started." I nodded as Meg pressed play on his stereo and on came the My Chem play list she made for me. She knew that I completely hate needles and in fact are scared of them and that My Chemical Romance music calms me down. I know what your gonna say; how can I get a tattoo if I hate needles.

I don't know how I could. I just love tattoos a little bit more then I hate needles I guess, but that doesn't mean I won't freeze up every time I see a needle. Cause trust me I do and that's where the music comes in. Their music calms me down just enough to allow me to get a tattoo with out freaking out. Its screwed up I know.

A couple hours later and I was done now showing the world three more tattoos. I paid Meg, but she shook her head and said "Why do you keep paying me I shall never know. Girl I'm your friend. I do this for you not for me to get paid." I laughed and said "Then how will you keep this going if you don't get paid?" We laughed as I said goodbye and got into my car.

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**Please tell me how you think? I would like some feedback. Don't think just because i'm starting this one means i'll forget about my other my chem one. So keep on your toes.**


	2. Chapter 2

Cody POV

As I drove home I got a call from Nikki's house. I answered saying "Hello?'

"Hey, Cody?" It was Mrs. Lapaya.

"Yes Mrs. Lapaya?"

"I assumed you heard?"

I could hear the sadness in here voice as I said "Yeah I heard. I'm so sorry."

"Don't be its not your fault. Would you come by our house? We have something Nikki wanted to give you."

"Sure Mrs. Lapaya I'll be right over. I'm about two blocks away. "

"Okay dear I'll see you soon."

Thoughts ran through my head as I thought of what Nikki could of possibly gotten me. Before I could think of anything I found myself sitting in their driveway. I got out of my truck and straight into the outstretch arms of Mrs. Lapaya. Her eyes were all red and puffy as she looked at me saying "Cody come right on in. You were Nikki's only friend well you were more like a sister to her."

I smiled sadly and said "She was the one person who truly understood me. The only one who knew how I felt. I never thought of her as a friend or even best friend. I thought of her as a sister." She smiled as I followed her I inside and to the living room. We sat down on the couch next to a table that had a whole bunch of boxes on it. Mr. Lapaya looked at me and said "Cody we have no idea that Nikki had any of this all saved up, but we do know that it's all for you. Go ahead and open the boxes."

I looked at them with confusion in my eyes as I grabbed one of the boxes and opened it. I found a giant metal box in it that had a lock on it. I took it out tried to opened it only to find that it was in fact locked. I suddenly remembered the key necklace she gave me two weeks ago. I took it off and tried the key in the lock to find it to fit perfectly.

I opened the box to find a letter to me on top of stacks of 100 dollar bills. We all gasped at all of the 100 dollar bills. I picked up the letter and read it out loud "Dear Cody, If your getting this I must of finally been able to end it. I'm sorry I did it; I just couldn't take it anymore. That's where you and I are different. Your strong Cody you can take all of it and I couldn't. I've saved all of this money since I met you for this day because one day you'll need it. Oh and remember that My Chemical Romance concert coming up in Belleville? Well look in the envelope in this letter before you read any further."

I stopped reading, opened the envelope, and gasped. Inside was one VIP backstage pass to the My Chem concert that was in 3 weeks. I was so excited! Nikki and I had talked about this concert forever. Since yeah know it had like all of our favorite bands. Like… Fall Out Boy, Boys Like Girls, and Blink-182. I then looked back to the letter and read "Your welcome and have fun girly. I'm going to miss you, but just remember that i'll be watching you all the time. Don't you dare make the same mistakes I've made. I don't want you going down the same road I did. Oh and you might want where some of the things to the concert! Love you Cody! I'm sorry Cody, Mom, Dad, world. I'm sorry. Love, Nikki"

I set the letter, money, and VIP pass down, got up, and hugged both Mr. and Mrs. Lapaya. Then I sat back down and grabbed the next box. Inside of it and six others contained all of her My Chem stuff. Like.. Posters, albums, t-shirts, hoodies, shoes, books, and lots more things. The next couple of boxes contained little inside jokes between the two of us and tons of pictures of us. The last box I opened was smaller then the rest, but contained a black cross with a red rose on it necklace. I remember Nikki drawing something like this, but whenever I'd ask her what it was she's always say 'Cody! You're not suppose to know yet! It's a surprise for you one day.' Then we'd laugh and continue what we were doing. I immediately put it on and then spent the next half hour with Mr. and Mrs. Lapaya. Then I loaded everything up in my car and headed back home crying.

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**Thanks for reading. Please review oh and tell your other My Chem fan friends to check this story out. Sorry it's so short :)**


	3. Chapter 3

Cody POV

All the way home I cried my eyes out until I pulled into my drive way. I dried my eyes and brought all the boxes to my room. Then I started packing for the concert even though it wasn't until 3 weeks from today. I was going to leave for the concert about a week before it so I can get my bearings of everything and also so I can just get out of this god damn town. I was sick of it here! I was sick of the people, the places, my parents and well just everything!

As I sat in my room on my bed holding a very recent picture of Nikki and I fell asleep. I fell into a deep dreamless sleep. When I woke up it was 12 pm of the next day. I slowly got out of bed and took a shower. Then I put on a pair of sweats and work out tee with a pair of running shoes. Then I grabbed my Ipod, turned on, and ran out the door to go on a run.

I ran out into the secluded area of my neighborhood and smiled when I'm Not Okay (I promise) came on. I looked around to make sure no one was there and started to sing "_Well if you wanted honesty that's all you had to say I never want to let you down or have you go it's better off this way for all the dirty looks the photographs your boyfriend took remember when you broke your foot from jumping out the second floor I'm not okay I'm not okay I'm not okay you wear me out" _

As I belted out those words I though of how Nikki and I would dance to this song out here in the middle of a field. How people would walk by and scream 'Freak' or 'Get a life'. Then it didn't matter how we looked we were having fun. _God_, I thought to myself, _I have to stop thinking about Nik. Its only going to make feel worse. She wants me to forget about my pain. God why can't I just forget about this!_

As soon as I got back home I went up to my room and wrote a poem.

****

Feels like something's wrong

Feels like no ones there

Did i do something wrong?

Then why does no one care?

I ask so many question

But only one is answered

Who are you they say

A marcher in the black parade

Nothings wrong

Someone's there

I am okay

Someone cares

I have myself

I have my music

I have my heroes

Isn't that what matters?

Once I finished and read it through I thought about how much this sounds like my life. I am alone, for now at least. There is someone out there that'll help me. I have music and my heroes . I have myself, but most importantly I have My Chem. They were like the only thing that kept me going. I just had to keep going on for Nikki. She doesn't want me to give up and for her I won't.

----------------------------------------2 WEEKS LATER-------------------------------------------------

I went through the bags that I packed one last time making sure I had everything since I was going to be leaving in an hour at 4:30am. I had three suitcases with clothes, another two with money one with drawing supplies, and then 3 others with other things I'd need. I also had my My Chem messenger bag that contained my laptop and my backpack the contained other things. Once I was sure I had everything I put on my Jack Skellington hoodies, grabbed my keys, and brought everything down to my car.

Once everything was loaded in I plugged my Ipod into the car, set it on shuffle, and started on the longish drive to Belleville. As I drove I sang almost every song that came on my Ipod. I still had the words from my poem floating through my head so I stopped by Meg's to get another that or my a couple tats. She smiled as I walked in even though it was 4:40am she said "Okay getting a that before we hit the road?" I nodded and said "Okay now I want this poem that I wrote tattooed on the inside of my arm and I think that's it." She nodded and went to work.

Once it was done I shivered at the sight of the needle, gave Meg a hug, and set off on the road again, but not with out drinking three Rockstars. By the time I made it to Belleville I had stopped numerous times to take a break and get some food and coffee. It was around 12pm when I finally rolled up to the hotel I would be staying at. My parents new I was coming here so they paid for my hotel room which they just happened to book at a 5 star hotel where like all the stars stay.

As I came to a stop in front of Hotel Carlata two men dressed in the hotel uniform came up to me and said "Hello miss. My name is Adam and that's John. I'll help take your bags to your room and he'll park your car for you." I just nodded and said "Kay. Let me grab some of my stuff from the front seats. You can grab all the stuff from the back. Here are the keys John." They both nodded and set off to do their jobs. I grabbed my Ipod, backpack, and messenger bag put them on and followed Adam into the hotel.

Before we walked in a saw security pulling a couple of girls dressed in My Chem gear out of the hotel. I looked at Adam and said "Uh Adam. What's with all the screaming fans?" He laughed at me and said "You don't know? Silly girl. The My Chem band members are staying here. I assumed you knew since you have My Chem gear."

I shook my head and said "I didn't know, but I don't really care. I'm not some screaming fan girl." He let out a big breath of air and said "Good cause your on the same floor of them." I looked at him confused and said "Wait what type of room did my parents book?" He smiled and said "A suit. Okay now follow me. You need a special key to get up to your floor since it's the top floor. So here's your key and now take us on up."

I nodded, took the key, put it in the little car reader thingy, and hit floor twenty. On the way up I checked my texts to find that I had one from my parents saying **'Have fun sweetie.'** I laughed and put my phone away. Finally we made it to the floor and he took me to my room. As we walked to my room, number 2098, a couple a kids my age were walking down towards their room saying "Damn did you see all those girls! Security is going to have a problem with them!"

I was fiddling around inside my messenger bag and ended up making my Ipod fall on the floor. I cursed silently under my breath as I bet down to pick it up. By then the boys had probably noticed me so when I started walking again they were staring at me. I just about dropped my Ipod again when I noticed that those boys were the members of My Chem. I just smiled sheepishly at them and walked into my room.

Adam helped move all of the luggage to my room and then went back downstairs. Then I hooked my Ipod up to the ihome and started to unpack everything. I started singing the song that was on which happened to be I Miss You by Blink-182. "_Hello there, the angel from my nightmare The shadow in the background of the morgue The unsuspecting victim of darkness in the valley We can live like Jack and Sally if we want Where you can always find me We'll have Halloween on Christmas And in the night we'll wish this never ends We'll wish this never ends Where are you and I'm so sorry I cannot sleep I cannot dream tonight I need somebody and always This sick strange darkness Comes creeping on so haunting every time And as I stared I counted The webs from all the spiders Catching things and eating their insides Like indecision to call you and hear your voice of treason Will you come home and stop this pain tonight Stop this pain tonight"_

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**Thanks for reading. Please review oh and tell your other My Chem fan friends to check this story out. Sorry it's so short :)**


	4. Chapter 4

Gerard POV

The guys and I were ditching wild fans all throughout the hotel until finally we made it to our floor. I had to say that this was probably the craziest its every been with fans. They showed up everywhere and I mean everywhere. So they guys and I were talking when we noticed a girl on the other end of that hallway walking towards us. At first we thought she was one of the crazy fans, but we realized she wasn't when we noticed the uniformed hotel employee with her bags.

She started searching in her bag for something and her Ipod fell out. She immediately bent down to pick it up when I noticed a tattoo on both of her arms. One was Jack Skellington with a gravestone next to it with some name on it, which I thought was pretty cool, and the other one was a whole bunch of words that seemed to make up a poem. She also had the words 'True Love' written on her knuckles.

As she stood back up she looked directly at us and sort of smiled. That's when I noticed how hot she was. She had this amazing hazel eyes and pitch black hair with blonde tips. She smiled at me when she noticed I was staring and I just sort of smiled back. Then I noticed her My Chem messenger bag and thought _Okay so she is a My Chem fan I suppose. So then why isn't she going crazy like the other fan girls? _

Once she walked into the room Frank and the guys pulled me into our room and said "Uh what are you doing?" I looked at them and said "Uh..nothing. Just looking at that girl's tattoos. They were pretty cool." They guys all nodded and Frank said "Yeah I noticed them. I also noticed her My Chem bag. Think she's another crazed fan?" I shook my head and said "No. I don't think so. Did you notice how she didn't freak out when she saw us." _No,_ I thought to myself, _this girl was different. She was unique and I can't stop thinking about her. _

There was only four rooms, well suits, on this floor and we had three of them. We were trying to get all four, but they had said that one of them was already taken and couldn't cancel their reservation. So it turns out that the girl we saw had the reservation. I wonder if her parents are with her. It sure didn't look like it. Oh well, I'll just have to watch.

I walked out to the balcony along with Mikey and Ray. They were watching all of the fans gathering at the bottom chanting our name, I was still freaked out about all the screaming. When it comes to screaming fan girls I do not like having anything to do with them. We waved to them and watched them scream even louder then before. We laughed even harder at them as I noticed that girl was out on her balcony too. She was shaking her head at the screaming fans and talking to someone that didn't seem to be there. I heard her say "God Nikki why'd you have to kill yourself. We could of made it together. You were like a sister to me. We could have been standing here together looking at the screaming fans or as you called them fake fans. Ha ha! I miss you. God I need someone now. I have no one. Did you see the new tat I got? It's a poem that I wrote and is very special to me now since it's the truth. I'll read it to you……

**Feels like something's wrong**

**Feels like no ones there**

**Did i do something wrong?**

**Then why does no one care?**

**I ask so many question**

**But only one is answered**

**Who are you they say**

**A marcher in the black parade**

**Nothings wrong**

**Someone's there**

**I am okay**

**Someone cares**

**I have myself**

**I have my music**

**I have my heroes**

**Isn't that what matters?**"

I smiled weakly to myself and thought, _Damn that girl just lost her best friend and god did you hear her poem. She mentioned that she felt alone, that she was a marcher for The Black Parade (like our song Welcome To The Black Parade), she has her music, and her heroes. Damn I feel sorry for her. _

She sat down in one of the chairs on the balcony, put her Ipod on, and started to draw something. I was watching her when Mikey snapped his fingers and I said "Wh..what?" They laughed and Ray said "Looks like little Gerard has a crush."

I shrugged my shoulders and walked back inside. Then I sat down next to Bob and watched some tv. Pretty soon I got bored so we got a game of Guitar Hero 5 going on.

Cody POV

Every single time I looked over at the band that just happens to be staying next to me Gerard Way was always looking at me. I would just smiled and think, _Why in the world would Gerard Way be looking at me?_ I started to draw since I had already gotten bored. I put on my Ipod and on came Welcome To The Black Parade. I smiled and started to draw a very detailed scene from The Black Parade.

------------------------------------------2 Hours and 10 Songs Later-------------------------------------------

I had finally finished drawing and realized that I hadn't had anything to eat for five or six hours. So I put my sketch book in my messenger bag, put my headphones back in, and headed down to a lobby to find a Starbucks.

Once I got to the lobby I was immediately surrounded by screaming fan girls who were yelling "Hey how did you get in the hotel?" I just rolled my eyes and went on my way to a Starbucks. About half way there I noticed a group of fan girls surrounding something or someone. As I got closer I noticed it was all of the members of My Chem. I put my Ipod on pause and pushed my way through to the center of the group. I saw the boys eyes get large as they say me and I just smiled.

Then I turned towards the now huge group of fans and screamed "Jesus look at you guys! You call yourselves real fans when you don't even act like one! A real My Chem fan would realize that they are just friends, people just like us, in a band doing what they love. You don't see me going up to them and being like 'OMG I love you guys so much. OMG OMG!! I can't believe you're here can I touch you?' No I'm not going to do that. I'm not going to be and obnoxious fan. Jesus you guys know how much they hate screaming fan girls, especially Gerard, and yet your out her acting like one! You should be ashamed of yourselves!"

When I had finished they were all quiet until one of them said "You know she's right. We've been acting like those whiney daddy's girls that get everything they want. Damn we got to stop screaming and bugging them like this." I smiled as everyone agreed and left. I put my headphones back in a continued walking leaving a very surprised band behind me. Once I made it to Starbucks I ordered my coffee and food. Then I sat down at a table and got out my drawing stuff only to find that my sketch pad was gone. It must of fallin out when I was getting through all of those fans. Damn it! I had all of my amazing drawings in there and a lot of them were of My Chem. God now I was going to have to buy a new sketch pad. Oh well money wasn't holdin me back from getting one.

Gerard POV

We were going out to get coffee with disguise on when a group of fans recognized us. I freaked because they were screaming fan girls, so I sort stepped behind Bob. He just looked at me and I shrugged as we were now surrounded by screaming fan girls. They were closing in on us when that girl from the hotel appeared in front of us. She smiled and turned and shouted at the fans. What she had screamed was true and the fans seemed to accept it. Then they left and I was about to say thank you when she put her headphones back in and walked off.

I was going to follow her when I noticed a sketch pad lying on the ground. I recognized it as her's and picked up brushing the dirt off of it. Now I had to go after her and I was when the guys stopped me. I looked at them saying "Guys I have to go after her. She just saved us from fans and she dropped her sketch book." Mikey looked at me and said "Later right now we have to get out of plain sight. More fans are on their way."

I nodded glumly and followed the boys back to the room holding the sketch books tight. I was definitely going to be checking out her drawings.

Once we made it back to the room in one piece I looked at the front of her sketch book to find a name 'Cody Rapp' written on the front. _Cool name_, I thought as I opened the sketch book. I was immediately greeted by a picture of girl that said Nikki last time I saw her. _So this is Nikki. Man she must of meant a lot to Cody for her to talk about her a lot and get her name tattooed on her arm. Yeah I saw the little gravestone for her next to Jack._

On the next page I found a portrait of Frankie. I knew it was Frankie; one because it was his face and two it said Frankie on the bottom. "Hey Frank, come check this out! She drew you!" He walked over and said "Who is this 'she' that you speak of?" I just laughed and said "That girl in that saved us from the fans. She drew a picture of you. Its really good actually."

I showed him and he said "Damn that girl is talented. What's her name?"

"Cody Rapp."

"Cool name for a girl."

"Yeah."

AS I continued to flip through the pages I found a portrait of each of us. I showed each of the guy and they all were amazed at this girls talent. I flipped through pages of amazing drawings when I came to stop on one that was a picture of her arm with her poem tattoo. I looked at it and studied the words. I smiled at the marcher in The Black Parade part and continued flipping through the pages thinking, _Man this girl feels completely alone since her friend died. Maybe I can make her feel better. She seems like a really cool girl and she is pretty cute. _

Finally I came to stop on the page she was drawing yesterday and gasped. She had drawn a full on detailed picture of the guys and I on the float in the video Welcome To The Black Parade. I had to give this girl props she was amazing. I have to give her the sketch book back tomorrow, but for now dinner and then who knows what.

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Okay so this is like the longest chapter i've ever written so i better get some good feedback. :) hope you liked it


	5. Chapter 5

Cody POV

As I sat in my hotel room wondering if I'd ever find my sketch book. That thing was very important to me since it had the drawing of Nikki that I did that night before she killed herself. She had said she wanted me to have a picture of her that I had drawn so I could keep it close to me forever. My eyes started to water as I thought of losing her.

I didn't want to cry so I put my Ipod on and went out onto the balcony. It seemed like every time I thought about Nikki the song I Miss You by Blink-182 always came on. I smiled weakly and sung out into the dark world before me. "_Hello there, the angel from my nightmare The shadow in the background of the morgue The unsuspecting victim of darkness in the valley We can live like Jack and Sally if we want Where you can always find me We'll have Halloween on Christmas And in the night we'll wish this never ends We'll wish this never ends_"

Gerard POV

When we got home from a dinner and having fun it was around 12:30pm. The guys were tired but for some strange reason I wasn't. So while they all went to bed I took Cody's sketch pad, some art stuff, and went outside on the balcony. I tried to be as quite as I could so I wouldn't wake they guys; it was a good thing too. I found Cody sitting on her balcony staring out at the sky singing "_Where are you and I'm so sorry I cannot sleep I cannot dream tonight I need somebody and always This sick strange darkness Comes creeping on so haunting every time And as I stared I counted The webs from all the spiders Catching things and eating their insides Like indecision to call you and hear your voice of treason Will you come home and stop this pain tonight Stop this pain tonight_" I smiled to myself and thought, _Wow she's really good. Hey I know what I can do! I can draw her and then write her message. Then I can give her sketch pad back._

I thought it was a genius plan so I started drawing her singing in the moonlight underneath the stars. I just listened to Cody sing as I quietly drew making sure not to make to much noise. I almost started singing with her when she started to sing I'm Not Okay. I could tell she really loved that song by the way she put her soul into it. She started crying in the middle of it and started to really sing it. I almost wanted to say "Its okay Cody I'm here for you."

When I finished my drawing it was around 2 in the morning and she wasn't singing anymore. She was crying and murmuring little things like 'I am alone' or 'No one cares.' I almost said that I cared and I was there for her, but I didn't want give away my cover. So on the back of the page I wrote..

__

**Dear Cody,**

_**Cool name. The guys want to say that you're an amazing artist and stuff. I just wanted to say you're not alone in this big black world. I'm sorry I spied on you, but it seemed like the right thing to you. Oh the guys and I also wanna say thanks for saving us from those crazy fan girls. Your right I do hate screaming fans. Hey just know I am here for you just know that. I hope you like the picture.**_

**_ From Gerard_**

Then I also put my number and told her to text or call me. Then I set it down next to the bed I was sleeping in the and fell asleep.

----------------------------------Next Morning----------------------------------------

I woke up at a little after noon and immediately took a shower and got dressed. I wanted to make sure I caught Cody so I could give her the sketch book, but for now time for some Starbucks. So I put on some disguise and walked out.

Cody POV

I woke up a little after 10 and got up to take a shower and get dressed. I put on a white tank top with jeans and my The Black Parade Is Dead! hoodie. I straightened my hair, put on some dark eye shadow, then I did my eyeliner, mascara, and finally was done. Before I walked out of the door I grabbed my skeleton gloves, phone, money, and Ipod.

As I headed down to Starbucks I once again saw all the screaming fans surrounding the door. I rolled my eyes and put my headphones in. I still hadn't gotten a new sketch book so after I ate I was gonna go shopping around. Once I made it to Starbucks I ordered what I usually got and sat on down at a table.

All of then in comes Gerard Way in a horrible disguise carrying a shopping bag. I nodded my head a wrote a napkin** 'The disguise isn't working to well.'** and walked up to him. Then I set the note down on the table. He read it and looked up at me saying "Is it really that noticeable?" I nodded and grabbed my coffee to leave.

He followed me over and said "Before you go I just wanna say thanks for saving us from all the fans and you dropped your sketch book. So here you go." He pulled my sketch book from the shopping bag and I smiled saying "Thanks. It was nothing though. People don't get that famous people are just people doing what they love."

He smiled and I felt my heart start pounding as he said "Your right. Hey do you maybe wanna hang out later?" I nodded and he said "Great I'll see you later." I smiled and walked back to the hotel thinking, _Wow now I don't have to go out and buy a new sketch pad, but more importantly Gerard wants to hang out with me. God he is so hot. I love his smile. Okay now lets check to make sure all the pictures are here. _

As I looked through the sketch pad I found that all of the pictures there and a new one. I looked at it and gasped. It was a picture of me singing in the moonlight. I turned the page around to find a letter from Gerard. I smiled thinking, _So he was watching me last night. I thought I heard someone out there too. Oh well can't take back anything. He's an amazing artist too. Look oh and he gave me his number. I'll text him when I get back to the hotel._

Once I got into the lobby I took my phone out and added his number to my contacts smiling. I had Gerard Way's number and he wanted me to text him. I sent him a text saying **'Uh… Gerard? Yeah this is Cody. Thanks for the drawing. I love it.'**

I almost immediately got a reply** 'No problem so how bout at 1 which is in like 20 mins I'll knock on your door and we can go to the park or something.'**

**'Sure I'd like that. See you soon.'**

**'Kay see you soon.'**

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:) hope you liked it


	6. Chapter 6

Gerard POV

I had told the guys about talking to Cody and they had all just smiled. "Sweet. When do we get to meet her? Cause she seems pretty cool. I mean she basically saved from being eaten alive by screaming fan girls.", Frank said as he shuddered at the thought. I even shuddered, screaming fan girls were my worst nightmare besides needles.

Yeah sure I'd love to get a tattoo, but I was deathly afraid of needles. Just the sight of them made me freak out. They would have to knock me out just to get one and near me. So I stick to permanent markers.

Finally it was 1pm and I knocked on her hotel room door. I gasped as she stepped out of the room. She looked amazing. Cody had redone her makeup and was now wearing jeans with a low cut 'Do or Die' shirt and a My Chem hoodie.

She rolled her eyes and said "Trying to catch some flies?" I smiled and said "Nice hoodie. Where to?" She looked at the ceiling and said "Up? To the roof I mean."

"Do you know how to get up there?"

She smiled and said "Yeah, but were not suppose to be up there."

Confused I said "Then how do you know how to get up?"

She blushed saying "When I get bored I sneak around. I wanted to see the stars, like I did with Ni..Nikki, so I found a way up to the roof."

Her eyes started to tear up after mentioning Nikki so I went up to her and hugged her. She wrapped her arms around me and I said "It's okay. Would you like to talk about it?" She nodded from inside my grasp and said "On the roof. Follow me." I let her go and followed her up the stairs to a door.

I tired to open it only to find it lock. I heard Cody laugh and say "Step aside Gerard there's only one way in." Then she pulled out this key looking thing and stuck it in the key hole. She moved it around and suddenly the now unlocked door popped open.

She smiled at me, took me hand, and led me to the middle of the roof where a blanket was laying. Then she sat down as I said "Cody where did you learn to do that?"

I sat down next to her as she said "Nikki taught me how to when I locked my keys inside my house." Her eyes started to water again as I said "Cody uh.. Who's Nikki?"

Tears started falling down her face as she said "Nikki was my best friend. She was more like my family then my own family ever will be."

She had started to really cry now so I brought her into a tight hug and said "What happened?"

She held onto me saying "She killed herself a couple of weeks ago. Died of an overdose."

I tried to think of something to say and only came up with "I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I need to get over this. I just need to face the fact that the only who had ever cared about me and was there for me is dead. I am utterly alone in this big blue world."

I looked at her straight in the eyes and said "Look at me. Your not alone. I'm here for you I care about you don't you get it! The reason I'm with you right now is because because…… I Love You."

She smiled softly while looking down at her fingers. I held her tight as she whispered "You know Gee, when I first saw you my heart stopped. I love you too."

I smiled and said "Okay now it's time to play 'Get to know each other'. Favorite color?"

She laughed, leaned into me, and said "Okay. Uh…. Black, red, and white. You?"

"Black and red. Movie?"

"Nightmare Before Christmas and Avatar."

"You and Frank will get along great. He loves Nightmare before Christmas. Avatar was pretty good. I have to say The City of Lost Children. Band?"

"Cool we'll have to watch it. Oh and My Chem, of course."

I laughed and said "Besides us."

She thought for a moment and said "I don't know. I like Black Veil Brides, Fall Out Boy, uh… Green Day, and uh.. a lot more. What about you?"

She started laughing as I answered "Besides myself? Smashing Pumpkins, Iron Maiden, and uh.. Green Day. What are you scared of?"

She stopped laughing, shuddered, and then said "Needles."

"Bu…but!"

She stopped before I could say anything else.

"I know what your going to say. How can I get a tattoo if I am deathly afraid of needles. Your gonna think its weird, but its just so happens that I can calm down just enough to get a tattoo by listening to My Chem. Yeah listening to you guy's music calms me down just enough."

"Wow. That's all I can say. Wow. Okay now I have one more question for you."

"Yeah Gee?"

"What's so wrong with your life that made you cut?"

She froze as I pulled her sleeve up her right arm. She had done a good job at trying not to make them noticeable. I mean they were just little white lines now, but I had noticed them. She grabbed her arm from my hand and held it to her chest.

Then she said "Used to. I don't anymore. I haven't for a year. And since you must know the only reason I stopped once because I met Nikki. She was just as bad as me; maybe worse, but we made it through together. I was still cutting and Nikki was still trying to get me to stop. Then I found My Chem. You guys saved my life literally. No joke you guys were the reason I stop cutting. You're the reason that I'm still here, but I still felt like shit sometimes. My parents didn't really even know who I was since they were never around to raise me. They were always off on a vacation or at their house in England for work sometimes 4 years at a time. I never saw them and after I had almost committed suicide, that was before My Chem, they would just pay me $1,000 a week to make me shut up or something. They even began to spend longer time periods out at England until I barley knew what my parents looked like. I was miserable, lonely, depressed, and worthless until you guys and Nikki came along. Their you got you story."

I looked at her and said "You have me now. Your okay now. Come on let's go meet the guys."

She shook her head and said "Wait! You can't tell anyone what I told you! Please!"

I nodded and said "I promise that I won't tell anyone. I just have one more thing."

She turned around to say something, but I leaned in and kissed her. Then I whispered in her ear "Will you go out with me?"

She nodded and kissed me back. Then we walked down to go see the guys hand in hand.

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:) hope you liked it. please review i don't like it when people read and don't review. it makes me think you didn't like it


	7. Chapter 7

Cody POV

I had just told this guy my entire life story and he didn't walk away. He actually kissed me and asked me to be his girlfriend. I couldn't believe this! Someone cared about me and it just so happens to be Gerard Way. I smiled, the first real smile I've done for a while. I was truly happy again.

Then we went back downstairs to meet the guys. Apparently they were really excited to meet me. As we walked to the door he put his arm around me, said "Okay. Now they might start to crack jokes or do something stupid, so just be prepared." I nodded while laughing as he opened the door. The guys were wrestling on the floor when we walked in. I laughed as Frankie, who was on top, was now thrown to the bottom.

He started yelling for Gee to help him. Gerard looked at me, shrugged, and dove in to help Frankie. He was immediately thrown to the bottom since it was three against two. Gerard then yelled for me to help; as did Frankie.

I smiled at them and said "You can't go easy on me because I'm a girl, okay?" Ray, Bob, and Mikey agreed so I jumped on them. Bob and Ray were busy holding Frankie and Gee down leaving Mikey to me.

We smiled at each other and attacked. Soon Mikey was on the ground screaming "Get her! Team up on Cody!" I smiled as Bob, Ray, Frank, and Gerard walked towards me to help Mikey. Soon I was flipped onto the ground with each person holding me down except Gerard.

He stood over me and said "Hmm… What should we do? Are you ticklish?" I just stared at him shaking my head. I hated being tickled it was like a form of torture. He saw my face drop and said "I think we'll tickle her." I started shaking my head as he came down with his arms out.

Suddenly all the guys were tickling me and I was screaming for them to stop. I was laughing so hard most of the time that I couldn't breath. Finally they guys got up leaving Gerard on top of me. As I caught me breath he leaned down and whispered "I didn't expect that to happen."

I laughed and put my arms around his neck. I smiled and whispered into his ear "This was fun. The guys are really nice. You know I've heard rumors that you all were stuck of and snotty." He smiled, but then started at me in horror and said "Wh..what? Where in the world did you hear that?" I laughed and said "It's only a rumor. I didn't believe it though."

He smiled and kissed me until the somebody said "Alright just because you to are together doesn't mean you can do that can do that every second! Come on guys lets go get some dinner. That includes you two. On the way Cody here can tell us about herself." We smiled and followed the guys out of the room hand in hand.

Once we made it to the lobby we could hear all the screaming fans. I looked at them right as they looked at me then we all looked out the fans. Gee looked at me again, then back out to the screaming fans, and said "Shit! How are we going to do this? You might get attacked by crazy screaming jealous fan girls!" I laughed and said "I'm a big girl. I can take care of myself. The real questions is are you going to be okay?"

Frankie laughed and him as he answered "I don't know. Will you protect me?" I looked at him trying to keep a straight face by saying "Don't worry baby I'm here for you. I'll protect you from the big bad fan girls." I failed of course. I burst out laughing, as did he, and the rest of the gang just sort of stared at us. Gee and I at the same time stopped laughing and stared at them with serious faces.

This finally got them laughing and made us start laughing again. We smiled at each other and he pulled me closer. Then we walked out towards the sea of fans. When they could see the guys they started cheering louder and then they saw me under Gee's arm. We just smiled at each other and then smiled at the fans. The happy look on a lot of their faces dropped into this angry rage. They were going to start a riot or something and that really freaked Gee out.

As the guys tried to calm down I quickly got one of the hotel personal to grab my car. Once it came I quickly got into the driver's seat and told the guys to jump in. They all smiled at me as they got in and Bob said "Sweet car. Thanks for the save again." I shrugged and took of my hoodie to reveal my black tank top. Then I hit the gas and drove around town.

Gerard POV

Jesus, those fans looked like they were about to start a riot after they saw Cody and I together. While we were trying to calm fans she had quickly gotten her car and I had to say it was a pretty nice Tahoe. Once we had all gotten in she took of her sweat shirt and I noticed another tattoo. She had 'Demolition Lovers' as an arm band around her right arm.

She looked at me, then looked down her arm, and said "What?"

"Nice tattoos. How many do you have?"

"Uh….."

She seemed to be counting all of them in her head as she drove.

"You've seen six of them out of 8."

"Oh really. What are the other ones?"

"On my left foot I have the words 'I Don't Care' and behind my ear I have a smiley behind my right ear."

She laughed as she showed me the smiley. I smiled and completely forgot the guys were in car until someone cleared their throat and said "Uh…yeah where are we going?" Cody shrugged her head and said "I hope that you guys knew. I've never been her before. I was just coming here for a week for your concert and then driving somewhere."

"Ah ha! So you are coming to our concert!", Frank blurted out.

She nodded and said "Yeah Nikki had bought me a VIP ticket."

I smiled so she was going to be backstage with us. Then I said "Sweet. And what do you mean driving somewhere? can't you go back home?"

She smiled sadly at me and said "Nope. I'm never going back there. Remember? My parents don't really know me and they don't care about me. So I'm moving out. To where I have no idea."

I smiled at her and said "Why don't you move here?"

All the guys agreed saying "Yeah why not? You know we live here. You could be with little Gerard."

I laughed and said "Yeah you could be closer to us. What do you say?"

She thought about it as I got a text from each of the guys saying '**Ask her to come on tour with us!**' I turned around and smiled at the guys. Then I turned back towards Cody, who was still thinking, and said "Before you say anything would you like to come on tour with us too?"

She smiled brightly at me and said….

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:) hope you liked it. please review i don't like it when people read and don't review. it makes me think you didn't like it

**I know cliffhanger :) i wanted to see what everyone said. :) so yeah enjoy**


	8. Chapter 8

**I DO NOT OWN ANY OF MY CHEMICAL ROMANCE. JUST MY CHARACTERS, PLOT, AND SONGS. **

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Cody POV

I was basically freaking out in my own way. I was just asked to move in with Gerard after I told them I had no where to go. I smiled and said "You know Gee….I don't think I should." I watched as his face dropped and I smiled even bigger saying "I'm just kidding. Of course I'll will." His face brightened up and hugged me as hard as he could.

"I thought you were going to say no.", he whispered in my ear.

"And why would I do that mister?" I whispered right back.

He smiled and kissed me until one of the guys said "Hello?" We blushed and Mikey said "Okay can we keep our eyes on the road now please?"

"Sure Mikey. Whateva you say.", I said with sarcasm as I looked back at the road. We started talking and ended up laughing until we could laugh no more. We still hadn't chosen a place to eat so I just pulled into the drive through at Wendy's. We had all order cheeseburgers, except for Frank, and were getting our food when their was a flash from a camera.

I shook my head and said "Okay what should we do? A- Photo Shoot with the Paparazzi, B- Lead them on a wild goose chase, or C- We could go back to the hotel after renting a whole bunch of horror movies?" I smiled at the guys through my cheeseburger and waited for their reply.

Finally Gerard said "Okay. Well how bout C? What do you guys think? Cause I know I could you a few good screams." Everyone agreed and I smiled setting course for the nearest blockbuster. "So Cody. How about tomorrow we grab all of your stuff and bring to Gerard and I's house?", Mikey said as we pulled into blockbuster.

I smiled as I stepped out the car saying "Sure. I'd love to. Just knock on my door whenever you want to leave. Okay now let's hurry and pick out the movies before the stupid paparazzi comes back." We all ran as fast as we could, grabbed a couple of random horror movies, checked them out, and got in the car to go back to the hotel.

Once we got there we started heading up to our rooms when there was a whole bunch of flashes. We all turned around to find the source was a group of paparazzi. I rolled my eyes and continued to walk in, the guys following behind me. As we made it upstairs and into the room Gerard came up behind me and hugged me. I smiled to myself and thought, _Someone cares._

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**I am sorry about the wait!!! been really busy!!! and sorry its really short!!!**


	9. I'M BACCCK :D

Dear All You People That Read This Story,

I'M BACK MOTHERFUCKERS333 Yes i am back(: and yes i am back for good :D I am sorry that i was away for so long i had to deal with my first year of high school... yeah it was just soooo much fun -.- Well i promise that i shall try to write up some chapters that you guys most definitely deserve!

**I AM SO SO SO SO SO SORRY FOR THE LOOOONG WAIT**

Love,

Ashkie Sage


	10. Gone But Not Forgotten

**Hey sorry I've been gone for so long. I've had high school and family problems I've had to deal with. A good friend of mine is also in the hospital for attempting suicide so I have to deal with that as well. So this goes out to you Cas, love you and you're stronger then all of this.**

**So anyways I am back and will be updating more I hope. I'm also rewriting the entire story because I did not like how it was and where it was. It was very poorly written and Gerard and Codie (originally Cody) got together way to quickly and I'm going to fix that and some other details in the story. So please bear with me and enjoy(:**

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Codie POV

Time seemed to freeze when I got the call, the call that changed my life. The call that my only true friend, Nikki, had died from an overdose. My world was slowly crumbling down all around me as I walked to the last day of high school. She was the only person who ever truly understood me; the only one who didn't care what I looked or acted like. Hell she was the only one who cared about anything at all.

As I finally arrived at school my so called "friend" Elizabeth came up to me with a "concerned" look on her face, "Hey girl, are you okay?" I just glared at her as I pushed past her and the rest of her group as she huffed, "Bitch! It's so obvious why you don't have any friends. Hell I wonder why I even try to be friends with you at all." That's funny; she's never once actually tried to be my friend. She invited me to her birthday party once in middle school but that's only because her mom made her. She's never actually tried to even talk to me before, hell Elizabeth doesn't even know what my name is.

The name's Codie Rapp and what she said about me having no friends is absolutely true. I felt completely and utterly alone in this big world of ours and there was nothing I could do about it. People didn't want to talk to me here because they were afraid of me due to how I look. At 5'1" with shortish pitch-black hair that was bleached at the tips, stick skinny body, and hazel eyes I looked like any other human being. That wasn't the problem though. I was made fun of day and night ever since I can remember because 1: I have a guys name, Two: I dress differently the most, Three: I'm not into the same things other kids are, and Four: I just don't fit in. Yeah let me just tell you that high school has been fucking hell for me, well school in general has been fuckin hell for me.

My family…fuck I don't even know what to say. They are almost never there for me and I hardly even know them. My parents are both workaholics who spend most of their time over in Europe, in France I think, then at home in Newark, NJ. With no other siblings I'm completely alone in this huge house we live in. The only thing I really have is my music. It's the only thing that has been able to hold me together; the only thing that could never leave me.

As I continued down the hall to my third class in a daze Adam, the jock of the school, said "Hey everyone look it's Codie. Mr. Loner is back make way for Mr. Fagoot. Whoops, I mean here comes Mrs. Loner Faggot." Yeah very original Adam, like I haven't heard that one before. This provoked everyone in the hall to continue calling me unoriginal names like emo, Goth, scene, slut, etc… I just blocked it all out and ran outside to the courtyard fuck school. I'm not dealing with this shit anymore. It's my last day of high school and I'm not about to spend it inside with all of those assholes.

I was going to spend the rest of the day sitting out in the courtyard doing whatever the fucking hell I wanted to. I just sat down up against a tree, turned my IPod onto I'm Not Okay, and started sketching in my book. By the time I'd finished about five songs I'd draw around ten-twelve pages all relating to either My Chemical Romance, pain, death, or anything I was feeling at the moment which just so happen to be a mixture of the last two including sadness.

The last class of the day was Art, my favourite class. Well pretty much the only class I liked and could be myself in. I wasn't going to miss that class so I decided to get up and head that way. Anyways after Art was over it would be time for the graduation ceremony and then I would finally be free from this damn place. As soon as I walked in Art kids started calling me names and poking fun at me. Ignoring them I grabbed some my sketchbook and just sat down and drew whatever came to mind. The scenes that came to mind were full of sadness and death due to Nikki's death.

When the bell finally rang all the seniors gathered in the social hall to get their caps and gowns as well as get in place for the ceremony to start. I don't remember when the ceremony began but I do remember being on stage and looking out into the crowd for my parents who weren't there. Of course they wouldn't even show up to their own daughters high school graduation. Whatever, I just can't wait until this whole event thing is over and we could finally leave this place for good.

As my fellow classmates said their sad goodbyes and their I'm going to miss you so much I quickly snuck out the back hoping not to be seen. This wasn't the case because Adam and his "gang" followed me out. As soon as I had left the school grounds he yelled, "Hey faggot! What are you just going to leave without saying goodbye to me?" So childish, I thought to myself as I just kept walking.

"Throwing rocks is a bit childish, don't you think Adam?" I said as I turned around to face him after feeling a rock hit my shoulder. "Why yes I do, let me throw something more grownup at you like my fist," he said throwing his fist, which I easily blocked. I then quickly punched him in the nose not wanting to deal with his bullshit right now. He fell to the ground stunned, holding his probably broken nose. I was tired of this bullshit and now that school was over I could finally do something about it.

"What the fuck was that for! You're going down emo bitch! Get her!" Adam shrieked as his nose spurted blood. The rest of his little "gang" attacked all at once leaving it four against one, not a very fair fight. Ah but what they didn't know was that I was in fact a black belt and knew how to defend myself. One after another they all joined Adam on the ground with either a broken nose or the wind knocked out of them. "I've had enough of your bullshit, I took it for four years and I'm fucking done with it. I've had enough of it and now that high school is finally over you are going to fucking stop," I yelled off to them as I walked away. The only response I got was muffled moans from the pile of mess that was Adam and his gang.

Once I made it home I didn't even bother walking inside the house fully knowing that there would be no one inside. Instead I got into my Jeep, love my fucking car so much, and drove off towards Meg's. She was a good friend about five or six years older than me, the only friend I had now that Nikki was gone. A few years ago, when I was 16 I believe, I went to her tattoo parlor and got a Jack Skellington tattoo on my left bicep. It depicted Jack sitting in a cemetery full of blank graves. She's also tattooed the anchor on my left hand on the skin in between my pointer and thumb that reads refuse to sink underneath.

She also tattooed _Wrist are for bracelets, not for cutting_ on my left wrist as a reminder that I'm better then all of that. There is also a music note behind my left ear representing my love for music. I also had a full colour sleeve on my right arm that was 80% completed. It was a mash of all my nationalities into one flowing tattoo. So it had images that represented Cherokee, French-Belgian, British, and German culture. It was a beautiful tattoo that was a pain in the ass to get. We'd been working on it for about a month or so now and it was almost completely done. Just needed to finish colouring part of it and then it will be complete.

This time I had a couple new tattoo ideas and an addition to my Jack tat. I also really needed to talk to her about Nikki. It was painful thinking about Nikki, but she was connected to everything I did so I would never be able to think about her. She'd always be in my mind, gone but not forgotten. She introduced me to my favourite band, My Chemical Romance, a few years back when I was in a dark place and contemplating suicide. Ever since she talked me down from the Jersey Bridge we were irrespirable. We became closer than ever and she acted more like a mother to me then my own mum ever was.

Speaking of suicide, after that whole ordeal my parents started drifting further and further away to the point where I hardly knew them at all. They'd give me $1000 a week just so I wouldn't bug them because they were "embarrassed" of me. That part was the silver lining of this whole ordeal. I'd put most of it in my own little banking account I'd set up and use the rest for little things I needed that week. They also, like most parents, had set up a college funds account for when I go, well if I go, to university. That account had more money then you could ever imagine, as did my banking account. $1000 a week added up pretty fast when you hardly spend anything.

Surprisingly I made it to Meg's without crying or hitting anything, which was a complete surprise considering the fact that I was an utter wreck. "Codie, what took you son long? Come right into the back," Meg yelled out as soon as I walked through the door. She always knew when I was coming; don't ask me how because I don't even know. Meg was sitting in the tattoo chair with everything already set up when I walked into the back room. With open arms she got up, "Come here little girl. It was just her time to go so don't worry. You're gonna be all right, you're a fighter Codie." Weakly smiling I hugged her, "Thanks Meg. I don't know how you do it, but you just make everything seem so much better then it really is. " She smiled and motioned to the chair, "So what shall I be this time?"

Laughing I said, "Okay well there's a couple I'd like. Firstly on my Jack tat could you add Nikki's name to the gravestone he's sitting on with the words 'Gone but not forgotten'. I also want to see if we can completely finish my nationality sleeve. Do you think that's possible?"

She nodded, "Yeah okay so let me get this straight, you want me to add Nik's name to the grave and then we'll finish your sleeve. Yeah we can definitely do this. It'll take five hours at the most to complete it. We'll work for two hours then take a break for an hour and then continue working on it just so we don't overwork your skin. But yeah this is definitely doable. So just sit back and relax as much as you can." This was great news; I'd finally have my sleeve done and it was already badass looking. I nodded at her and put my headphones in as I pressed play.

The My Chemical Romance playlist came on with their song 'Lady of Sorrows' coming up first on full blast as Meg started up the machines. You see I'm scared to death of needles, I just have this deep fear of them and have to drown out the sound other wise I'd probably have a panic attack. I don't know where the fear came from but I can deal with it if I drown everything out with music. But not just any music, it has to be My Chemical Romance or I'll start panicking. Now this doesn't mean that I don't freeze up when I see a needle anymore, it just calms me down. Their music calms me down just enough to allow me to get a tattoo without freaking out and having a panic attack.

Two hours went by pretty quickly and we were already half way done. She had finished adding Nikki's name to the gravestone and it looked amazing. She even added her favourite flowers in front of it, Lily of the Valleys. She had also begun working on my sleeve and I must say that it looks fucking amazing. Instead of taking an hour break I convinced her to just wait twenty minutes and then start again. I was impatient and really wanted to see my finished piece. As the next hour and half passed Meg was able to completely finish the sleeve. It was gorgeous. She didn't use any bright colours at all, which is what I wanted, and used a more traditional style design, which I also wanted.

"Thank you much Meg! It all looks amazing! I'm so happy the sleeve is finally over with; I'm in love with it. Now how much do I owe you for all of this?" I said crushing her to death. She just shook her head, "Girl I don't understand why you keep paying me, I'm your friend and friends are free. I do this for you to be happy, not for me to get paid." I laughed, she always does this to me. "How will you ever keep this going if I never pay you?" I jokingly questioned. Her tattoo parlor was always busy and was doing pretty damn well. There were always clients in there and she always had clients on a waiting list. That's why this is a joke to us. We laughed about it as I said goodbye and got into my car. Where I was going now, I did not know.


	11. Gifts From The Dead

**Here's the next chapter, enjoy and please review(:**

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Codie POV

I was driving out to god knows where when my phone rang. It was Nikki's house phone... "Hello?" I answered it trying to pull myself together.

"Hello Codie. Can I talk to you?" It was Mrs. Lapaya, Nikki's mum.

"Hi there Mrs. Lapaya, yeah I can talk. How can I help you?"

"I assume you've heard about Nikki?"

I could hear the sadness filled in her voice, "Yeah, I heard. I'm so sorry. I've meant to call you as soon as I heard but I just haven't had the strength to do it. Ut was rough going throughs school today and facing everyone on my own. I'm so sorry for your lost, I miss her so much already."

"It's okay Codie, its not your fault at all. You tried to help her overcome all of this so please don't blame yourself. Her death is hard on all of us but we all have to be strong for her. She would have wanted us to be. Could you stop by the house though? We have something to give you from Nikki, she left quite a bit behind for you."

"Of course I can. I'll be over in about five minutes, I'm only about two blocks away."

"Okay dear, see you soon. Drive safely."

Ideas were running through my head as I tried to think of what Nikki could have possibly left for me. Nothing could come to my mind, there wasn't anything I needed or wanted. Before I could even think of anything I found myself sitting in her driveway perfectly fine. Even in death she was looking out for me, I'm going to miss her so much.

Slowly I got out of my Jeep and made my way towards the front door. Before I could even knock Mrs. Lapaya opened the door and took me in her arms. I noticed how puffy and red her eyes were as she said, "Codie I'm so glad you came. You were Nikki's only true friend, more like a sister to her then anything. She left you a bunch of things through so please do come in." I smiled sadly as I followed her inside, "she was the only person who truly understood me. The only one who knew how I actually felt. She was the only one who actually cared how I felt. I never thought of her as a friend, she was my sister. She was more like family then my own family ever has been or will be."

We sat down on a couch in the living room, which was currently full of boxes. Mr. Lapaya smiled sadly at me, "Hi Codie. Okay so we had no idea that Nikki had any of this saved up, but we do know that its all for you. So I guess go on ahead and open them." I looked at them with confusion riddled in my eyes, I had no idea what could be in any of these boxes. The first box I grabbed contained a giant metal lockbox that was in fact locked. Why would Nikki give me a locked box with no way of opening it? Wait, she gave me a key necklace a couple weeks ago and made me promise I'd always have it on me. I guess this is why because the key fit perfectly in the lock when I tried.

I slowly opened the lockbox to uncover a letter sitting on stacks of one hundred dollar bills. We all gasped at the sight of all that money. There had to be at least fifty thousand dollars sitting right there in front of me. Now I guess its time to read the letter and stop staring at all of this money sitting on my lap. I picked up the letter and began reading, "Dear Codie, if you're reading this right now then I might have finally been able to end it. I'm sorry I did it; I just couldn't do it anymore. I couldn't ignore society and it beat me. That's where you and I are different. You're strong Codie, strong enough to take on the entire world by yourself and beat it. You can take it all and I can't. Well the contents of this box are my life savings really. I want you to take it and use in on your upcoming adventure. Yes I did say upcoming because you do have an adventure coming up pretty soon. Remember the My Chemical Romance tour starting up in Bellieville? Yeah well look in the envelope in this letter before you read any further."

Mrs. Lapaya handed me the second envelope as I stopped reading. I think my heart stopped for a moment when I realised what was inside. The envelope contained a VIP pass and a ticket that read all dates to the My Chemical Romance tour that started in three weeks. I couldn't believe this! Nikki and I had talked about going to this show since we heard rumours about it. We'd also talked about maybe following the tour and go on an adventure. This tour was going to be amazing! It had all of our favourite bands like My Chem, Green Day, Fall Out Boy, The Used, and who could forget about Blink-182. Oh god I could not wait for this show.

With half a smile on my face I began reading the rest of the letter, "You're welcome and have fun. I bought you a VIP pass and ticket that will work on every single stop of the tour. So pack your bags Codie because you are going on an adventure. Go have a good time but don't do anything stupid. Well don't do anything too stupid. I'm going to miss you and I know you're going to miss me, but remember that I will be watching you. I'll be keeping my eyes on you as I party with Kurt Cobain and all the other amazing musicians that have past away. Now don't you dare make the same mistakes I have, you're stronger then me. You're stronger then all of this and you will beat it all. Now I have to go but I want you all to know that I love you all so much and I will always be keeping my eye on you. Love You all so much and I'm so sorry I wasn't strong enough to beat all of this. With love, Nikki."

After reading the letter I put everything on my lap next to me and got up to hug Mr. and Mrs. Lapaya. We sat there in silence just hanging on to each other for a couple of minutes. It was going to be hard without Nikki here but like she said I was strong and can do it, I have to be strong for her. I have to be strong for all of us. Mrs. Lapaya handed me the next box as I sat back down on the couch.

I opened it to discover that it was full of her band stuff. Posters, shirts, shoes, hoodies, books, etc. basically anything and everything that had to deal with music. The next couple of boxes contained inside jokes between us and tons of pictures, she had made an entire scrapbook full of all of our adventures. The last box I opened was much smaller then the rest. It held this beautiful necklace that incorporated a rose, key, and music not. I actually remember Nikki drawing something very similar to this a while back. When she saw me watching her draw it she flipped out and told me not to look because it wasn't ready yet. Well I guess it was finally ready for my eyes to see now. I immediately put it on and squeezed the pendant as hard as I could in my hand. I then spent the next half hour or so with her parens before packing everything in may car to head home.


End file.
